It’s funny how you brush something off as bologna until it happens to you. Like when you hear about celebrities canceling tours or an appearance because of “exhaustion.” I used to think, ‘Sure, sure… they just partied too hard and couldn’t admit it.’
But then – this whole “exhaustion” thing started happening to me. I didn’t know what it was at first. I thought I had food poisoning, or anxiety, or something – when in reality it was just my body’s way of saying: “Hey – you’ve been doing a pretty crap job of taking care of me lately – so I’m going to go ahead and make you so nauseous that the only thing you can manage to do is sleep! Because you need it!” It’s clearly not a good thing, especially because I can’t manage to eat much of anything for a day or two when I feel like this. So rather than gain weight when I’m stressed and overworked – I lose it (and then begin to resemble a 14 year old girl… which is… less than awesome if you ask me).
It happened to me last year around this same time, and hit the peak at my birthday party/going full-time party. I felt miserable & was actually falling asleep at my own party!! True story. (And super embarrassing.)
Then it happened to me again last week (it has apparently become a birthday week tradition). We were scheduled to have Thursday off before our double-header wedding weekend, but James had homework to do, and I had editing to catch up on, so we ended up working instead. That is until about 6:00pm when my body shut down on me. I was in the middle of prepping a blog for Friday and I nearly fell off my desk chair because I became nauseous so suddenly. I went to the couch in hopes of just laying down for a minute to regroup… instead I was out for the night. If I tried to do anything different – I immediately felt like I might pass out or get sick. So I listened to my angry body and slept – for 16 hours – right through my beloved Packers beating the Bears (so you know I was wiped out)!
The next day (without knowing anything about how I’d been feeling) – I started to get emails, comments on facebook & the blog, and text messages from my brides. They were urging me to take care of myself, and take some time off for my birthday – and not just a day… a couple days. What blew my mind is that these weren’t past or future brides – these were current brides of mine who are patiently waiting on their wedding photos. (As a former bride myself, I am aware how anxious you are to see those photos… I know that you are itching to have them in your hands and to look through each one a million times.) So for these amazing ladies to be writing me, telling me to take care of myself, and not worry about them – blew. my. mind. So much so that I cried each time I got a new message! I was overwhelmed that my clients didn’t just care about themselves or their photos – they cared about me as a person, and about my well being. I was overwhelmed that although none of them knew that I hadn’t been feeling well the past day or two… they were sending me these messages, just when I needed to hear them most.
Over the weekend I made sure to continue to get plenty of sleep and drink a ton of water so I was 100% for our weddings. (Even though – I knew I didn’t need to worry about them because when I’m shooting I get ‘in the zone’ (other photographers know what I’m talking about, I’m sure!), and forget about anything but the task at hand.) So now that we’ve made it through – and here I sit after a busy weekend…. I’m going to take my clients’ advice – and we’re taking 2 full days off around here!! I’m claiming that today is my birthday day off, and Monday is our 1 year 100% self-employed anniversary day off!
So here I sit on Sunday, writing this post because I couldn’t help but get it off my chest. I know today is technically a day off (and I promise you, I’m taking it off!), but I had to just write and say THANK YOU to all of you. I wanted to tell you all how blessed I feel because I have the best clients in the world. I wanted to tell you how blessed I felt this weekend reading all the lovely birthday wishes you guys left me via text, email, voicemails, and posts on FB/Twitter. I’m honestly overwhelmed by all the support and love. I can’t believe I’m 31 (what?!), and I can’t believe we’ve been going at this 100% self-employed thing in the Tyler house for a year already! (But more on that in a self-employed post later this week.)
Anyway – the couch is calling me! I want to continue to be 100% for the remainder of this wedding season, so I’m using these 2 days to reboot and relax! I plan to sleep A LOT, and eat everything in sight. I’m going to have a happy belly, rested body, and full heart when I come back on Tuesday! Thank you again for everything! You guys are THE BEST!
All my love! ~Christy